How to speak Canadian: vol. 4

Hey gang. I haven't done one of these in a long while! This particular volume is going to focus on grammar rather than vocab, some of which is specific to the cape.

First of all, there's a loose grasp of prepositions here, especially in relation to the word "done." When someone is done with something specific, people will often skip the preposition "with." Here are two examples of how we (I) would say it, followed by the way my Caper buddies say it:

"What time are you done with work?"

vs.

"What time are you done work?"

"You're almost done with your beer."

vs.

"You're almost done your beer."

This is not a drastic change. I didn't even really notice it until recently, but once you pay attention, it's there. I'm not sure if this is only a Caper thing or not. My friend Mark, who is from the Cape, does this most often, but Maile, who is from Alberta, does it from time to time. I'll have to ask around.

My second tip is also going to involve beer. This is a very small grammatical thing, but I'm not sure if it's Cape-specific. When referring to multiple bottles/cans of beer, the word "beer" is treated like "sheep" or "fish." It's not pluralized with an "s." Example:

"I've had two beers tonight."

vs.

"I've had two beer tonight."

I haven't picked up on this with anything else so far, so I'm not sure if it's specific to beer. I have friends from Ontario, Labrador, and the cape who pluralize beer in this way, so I think it's more than just a Caper thing.

Last but not least is a Caper thing, 100%. I've been told that grammar in the cape and in Newfoundland and Labrador is treated more loosely than Minnesota and other parts of our two countries. Now, there are quite a few ways in which my Caper and Newfie friends disregard their grammar, but there is one consistent phrase that I hear from all Capers:

"I saw your parents," or "I have seen your parents."

vs.

"I seen your parents."

The use of the verb "to see" is almost always used in this way by my more vernacular Caper friends. This is so common that it was actually mentioned to me when I first arrived, an explanation along with "by" and other localisms. This little Caper quirk makes my ears itch, but I can't deny the endearing local flavor.

So there you have it. A few brief grammar lessons from your favorite little expat.

Keep reading!

Love,

Maggie

Dominion Beach

This is what we call a Historical Post, in which I give y'all some pictures from the past. When I first got to the Cape in late August, my friends and I made quite a few trips to a local beach in Dominion. Want some pictures?

Beaches here are different from beaches at home. The first and most obvious difference is the salt water, seeing as Cape Breton is perched on the edge of the Atlantic. Our dear friend Tim, from Ontario, had never seen the ocean before. I've never seen someone dive with such enthusiasm! He made it 25 years before seeing an ocean!

Another difference is the weather. In Minnesota, August means high temperatures and blue skies. The weather was beautiful in its own way, but I'm not used to seeing so much gray!

This photo features Maile and Paige. Paige is from the valley, which is at the other end of Nova Scotia.

We played in the waves for a long time. Seeing as our voyage took place around the time that a hurricane was tearing its way up the east coast, we enjoyed some seriously impressive waves. We've actually enjoyed the effects of several hurricanes since my arrival, usually manifesting as rain and severe wind. My teeny little Swiss roommate has been physically lifted off her feet several times from the force of the gales!

However, eventually the cold drove even the toughest of us to shore. After his leap into the ocean, Tim decided that he wanted to be buried in the sand. So, being girls, Paige, Maile, and I made him into a mermaid.

He took to the role quite well, I think. If you look closely, he even has scales! We combed the beach for flat rocks and decorated him. An integral part of any trip to an ocean beach, I think. Right?

I think we spent two or three days bumming around on the beach like this. We played in the waves and the sand and walked along the beach and skipped rocks and gossiped. I might've made more more if I'd stayed a bit longer in Minnesota to work, but I definitely made the right call in arriving early to the cape. I've never had so much fun!

Pictures from Headphone Disco, Mabou, and Tight&Bright are on the way!

Love,

Maggie

Funny stuff my professors say: vol. 4

It's back.

[Mark Silverberg]

"I've had two daughters. I've lived through all the princess stuff."

"There's all this gross language about him. He's just... gross."

[Jan Curtis]

"Hello, scalliwag." "How are you scalliwags?" "Two scalliwags in this row." (and so on...)

"I caught someone else's bug. It's not mine, but the frog keeps threatening."

"I seem to have suppressed my frog for a little while."

"Yeats's son was a tall, strapping man who had no idea what his father was talking about."

"I wander around Wikipedia and find it useful. I also enjoy finding their mistakes."

"The more you disagree, the more I like it."

"You don't have to believe what I'm saying. Argue with me. Tell me I'm all wrong. I love it."

"He's kind of a Terminator figure in Irish myth. Beowulf is the Terminator for the Anglo-Saxons."

[Todd Pettigrew]

"We hope it wasn't the last thing he wrote, because it kinda sucks. It's pretty lame poetry."

"The rumor is that he partied too hard at his daughter's wedding and got sick from that and died. Let that be a lesson to you!"

"They cut off your head and put it on a spike on the London Bridge as a warning to other criminals coming into the city. Don't f*** with us!"

"Pasta is a dough that you boil. It's awesome! It's ground-breaking!"

"It was a dirty world, Shakespeare's world."

"Of course it all goes to hell, but that's history for you."

"Between knockin' up Anne Hathaway and striding the London stage, Shakespeare must've been doing something."

"He's a bad man because he's being dominated by his wife. This is a renaissance view. This is not my view. Anyone who knows my wife knows that."

"He falls asleep on the street. We've all been there!"

"Now we're on to anal sex jokes! Oh, Shakespeare."

"That came out slightly dirtier than I intended."

"It was like, 'Do you take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife?' 'F*** yeah!'"

"As I'm fond of saying, there's no such historical period as 'back then.'"

"A little homophobic joke there."

"Whoa... where's the voice coming from? Oh, the door's open. I thought I was losing my mind!"

--

This is after only three weeks of class. It's only going to get better.

Love,

Maggie

Stuff that's awesome.

So I've a busy weekend ahead of me. As a result, I'm writing some good news as well as a preview now in order to spawn breathless anticipation of the epic pictures to come.

Stuff That's Awesome

A partial list

1. When I wake up in the morning, I'm in Canada. This means Keith's, Coffee Crisp, Tim Hortons, and, most importantly, my Canadians.

2. I've chosen a topic for my directed study paper. I'm writing about the Hunger Games, which y'all should know is my favorite book series ever. I've been geeking out more than a litte and reading The Hero with a Thousand Faces (Patrick Hicks, eat your heart out!) to analyze Katniss as a heroine on a quest.

3. My roommates are amazing cooks. I mean amazing. Jaime made us quinoa pilaf the other day and occasionally whips together these divine scrambled eggs that taste like heaven. Maile is a whiz at "winging it with the spices," and she made a black bean tofu stir fry the other day that was one of the best vegetarian dishes I've ever had. So yeah. I eat quite well.

4. Tight and Bright is tonight. You may remember this from last year, when I went out looking like Peter Pan on an acid trip. I'm spending the day downtown at the thrift shop Value Village and vintage shop Gala to compile an outfit with a few of my favorite Canadians. It's the roomies, of course. Last year's winner, Tim, is joining us, and we're hoping to absorb some of his victorious tight-and-bright aura to give some oomph to our ensembles. Last but certainly not least is the ever-so-delightful Kyle Capstick, who rocks $3 Value Village sweaters like nobody's business. Today is going to be great.

5. Lumière is tomorrow night, and my roomies and I are volunteering! It's an outdoor art festival of sorts. It's supposed to be absolutely freezing, but we get free toques for volunteering! It's going to be an absolutely wonderful cultural event. I can't wait!

So there's a brief synopsis of my life events. I'll post pictures and such as soon as I can. Keep reading!

Love,

Maggie

Food for Thought

Of the many ways in which I've been blessed, one is the fact that all four of my fabulous grandparents are still living and kicking around in various parts of Minnesota. Grandma Katie, my paternal grandmother, celebrated her 80th birthday yesterday. My roommates and I serenaded her with an off-key rendition of that good ol' birthday song before she and I had a very enlightening conversation.

For the record, the relentless conquistador does read this blog... so here's your feature, Gran!

I was telling Grandma about how much I love Cape Breton and how happy I am here, and she said, "You know, Maggie, I think Augie's going to be a major letdown for you in the spring. Other than when you were running that new student orientation stuff, I've never seen you this happy at college."

Huh.

That's kinda all I said. "Huh. Yeah."

Now, I have a confession to make, and Gran, I apologize for this. I'm one of the younger cousins on either side of my family. Growing up, I always felt slightly overshadowed. The older, funnier, cooler, braver (cockier) cousins did the cool stuff like college etc. first, and so I didn't think my milestones were as exciting to my grandparents. I only realized recently that all four of my grandparents see me as an individual, not just one of a grab-bag of grandkids.

Grandma Katie knows me. She knows that I'm different from my siblings and my cousins. She knows my favorite things and remembers what I was like as a child. She knows ME. And thus I realize the gravity of Grandma Katie's words: "You're happier in Cape Breton."

I think she might be right.

I'll be honest with you guys. I've been thinking about staying. Sure, Augie's great. I absolutely adore my professors, I have some fantastic friends, and I was only a few hours away from home. But here...

Here there is a cultural experience that Sioux Falls simply cannot match. Sydney is unique. Halifax is amazing. The school's residential community is loving and inclusive. My professors are funny and challenging. My roommates are incredible. The alcohol attitude is healthy and the campus bar is unbelievably fun. And yeah, so maybe there's this really great guy, too. But I mean it. I am so happy here.

I don't know yet if I'm transferring. But Gran's observation made me think. If my eighty-year-old sharp-witted grandmother, who I see only a few times a year, can pick up on the range of my happiness through blog entries and phone calls alone... well, that's saying something.

Happy birthday, Gran. I love you.

Deja vu.

A short time after I arrived in Cape Breton in January, I developed a sty in my eye.

A short time after I arrived in Cape Breton in August, I developed pink eye. I have a satan cornea. At least the red matches the Canadian flag.

I've spent the day quarantined in my apartment, unable to attend class. As a result, my apartment is spotless and the counter is playing host to the cakes I've made for a birthday celebration tonight. Mark is 24 today, and Maile is 20! We're having friends over for drinks and sweets: a nice, quiet evening.

Anyway, I need to go squirt polysporin into my eyeball.

Love,

Maggie

Sparknotes: My Second Semester at CBU

Hey gang! I've been a horrible slacker who hasn't posted for months, so here I am!

I've been back since the 27th of August, and a LOT has happened since then. I wouldn't dare try to summarize my adventures in a single post, so they'll come in doses. For now, here's a Sparknotes edition of what I've been up to.

Living Arrangements

I am no longer living in Harriss Hall! I have migrated to Cabot, which is a campus-owned apartment building just across the sidewalk. I share a four-bedroom, two-bathroom apartment with Maile, Jaime, and Kendra. You may remember mentions of the first two from last year. Kendra, a first-year from Baddeck, was randomly assigned to our apartment, and we love her.

Apartment living is just about the best thing ever. We each cook supper one night a week, and so far, we've enjoyed lentil soup, stuffed peppers, hummus pizza, fancy macaroni, and more. It's going to be one delicious semester!

In the photo: Maile, Jaime, and me at the recent Headphone Disco. Maile is 5'10"-ish and hails from Calgary. Jaime is 4'8"-ish and comes from Switzerland. The height differences in this picture are not exaggerated.

Classes

I'm still studying English! Here's a list of my courses:

1. Modern American Fiction. This class has only five students, and our professor is wonderful. We've read The Awakening so far, and I am often reminded of just how much I love fiction.

2. Celtic Literature. This class is taught by a woman whose favorite word is "scalliwag." She addresses us as scalliwags on a regular basis. It's awesome. We also read about fairies. What's not to love?

3. Middle English Literature. My professor reads us poems in Middle English. And we're going to do an in-depth study of the Canterbury Tales. Very high on the happy-geek-o-meter.

4. Shakespeare. I truly love Shakespeare. His life is fascinating, and he is truly a master of the craft. Also, my professor reminds me of one of my favorite English profs back at Augie.

Outings/adventures

Here's just a list, but I'll provide pictures and stories later.

1. Trips to Dominion Beach

2. Silk-dyeing workshops in Mabou

3. Headphone Disco

4. A good deal of tasty food

My apologies again for severe slacking. There will be volumes of "Funny Stuff My Professors Say" and "Real Canadians" in the future.

Keep reading!

Love,

Maggie

What am I doing?

Hey gang. I haven't posted in almost a month. Here's a few updates.

1. I'm home! I've been in Plymouth for a week and a half, and it's still weird.

2. I start work tomorrow at Redleaf Press as their editorial intern! I had an interview a few days after I came home, and I got an email shortly thereafter offering me the position. There was much jumping and shrieking on my part. Since then, I've been building my Grown-Up Wardrobe so I can impress my new bosses. The best part? Redleaf's building is located in - get this - Little Canada, MN. Fitting, eh?

3. I will hopefully be starting work at Ann Taylor soon. I'll find out tomorrow if I got the job.

4. I am counting down the minutes until I can head right back to Nova Scotia.

That's all for now. Don't expect a whole lot of action around here until I ship back out. In the mean time, have a wonderful summer!

Love,

Maggie

Funny stuff my professors say: vol. 3

The third and final volume... for this semester! Click here for volume one and here for volume two.

[Mary Keating]

"I have to get off that tangent. I've been watching the news too much... Imagine a world where children only learned science and math! No one would speak!"

"I'm not sure what I want to think about this morning."

"I only know this because my mother dragged me to a seminar on satanic culture."

[Ian Brodie]

"Well, I grabbed that turtle by the face and squeezed it for all it was worth. New expression. Copyright: me."

"Why do I always use documentaries from the mid-eighties as my examples?"

"Don't say it's similar. It's similar in the way Cape Breton and Newfoundland are similar. Fisticuffs!"

"He's buried there if anyone wants to go spit on his grave. But hey, he's handsome!"

"So for the couple of days leading up to lent, party like it's 1999."

"It's Newfoundland tasteful. It's Cape Breton slutty."

[Richard Marchand]

"I mean, he's murdered all these people, but what the hell? He's a nice guy underneath."

"I actually had - I stand here as witness - a Captain Hook dream."

"Her parents were smoking up after supper, and she was really relaxed when she went to bed."

" 'Girls are much too clever to fall out of their prams.' Ha! Sexist pig!"

"I once bought a pair of cowboy boots at a garage sale for twenty-five cents, which suggests that they were really trying to get rid of those boots."

"You had to do it with gusto. Follow the yellow brick road, dammit!"

"The time-gods are generous... for once!"

"It was like a law. Not a law, a commandment! The eleventh commandment!"

"I wore britches. It was like the uniform of boys ages eight to twelve. Why, I have no idea."

"Wow. I spent eight minutes on the word 'gables.'"

"If you gave an eleven-year-old girl three glasses of beer, she's be under the table. At least she'd better be under the table..."

"I had a slate. Not that I used it in school. Those were before my time, I hasten to add."

"His kid said, 'Tell me a story, Daddy!' What else do kids say? Nothing."

"Oh my god, equality! You're turning the national upside down!"

[Anna Daniels]

"We have to honor the relationship we have with Katherine... Ha! It sounds like we have to marry her because we got her pregnant."

"Laughing time is over."

"You're an English major, Maggie. You live for transitional phrases."

"Why don't you just wrap the individual children in foam?"

"He has a PhD now. The guy who put gravel in his pants and ate glue."

"I'm sure when the wheel was invented, some people were like, 'I don't want to get involved in this shit.'"

"That sounds like a delicious sandwich."

"Despite the fact that his facial hair is hilarious, he was a brilliant man."

"I don't want you to have to think up some crazy banana car on the exam."

--

The time has gone too quickly... but next semester will come soon enough!

Keep reading!

Love,

Maggie

Things I (don't) Miss

My dearest friend Becca, whose blog is found here, has been doing a mini-series about things she misses about home. I'm copying her.

Things I Miss

1. Target

We do have Walmart here, but it's not the same. I grew up in the metro area that houses the Target headquarters. I have my loyalties.

2. Izzy and Wedge

Pictured at right. Izzy is the poodle, Wedge is the fat cat. They are guarding my brother, Sam, as he recovers from an appendectomy.

I haven't so much as seen a cat since I've been here, and the only dog is a guide dog, so I can only pet him on occasion. I am starved for furry companions, and I am very excited to be back with these critters for the summer.

Since he's featured in the picture, I suppose I can admit that I miss my brother, too. And my sister, even though she isn't pictured.

3. Free printing

Actually, the entire Mikkelsen library. The CBU library isn't a total bust, but the printing is expensive, and the book collection is limited. Also, the study rooms aren't as nice, and the study tables are usually housed in dark corners. I miss the sun-washed great room of Mikk.

Things I Don't Miss

1. Communal bathrooms

At Augie, I shared toilets and showers with 30-odd girls. Here, I share with one. What's not to like?

2. Friday classes

I have a three-day weekend. If my Thursday class gets cancelled, I have a four-day weekend. One extra day to do homework and dedicate myself to my studies... and by that, I mean goof around with friends and watch movies.

3. American attitude

In the states, we believe that we are better. There is this undercurrent of superiority in everything that we do. You don't find that here.

People here are more accepting. Yeah, sure, they give me crap for being American, but they don't truly look down on anyone. And I love it.

Looking back, my priorities are very clear. I wrote the most about my dog and cat.

Keep reading! Pictures tomorrow from Devon's birthday!

Love,

Maggie

What I've Been Up To

I haven't written in a while. My apologies. Here's a quick recap of what I've been up to.

1. I'm going home in a month. I'm trying to wrap my head around it. I have every intention of returning in the fall for another semester, assuming I can work it out. However, there are still quite a few people to whom I will have to say goodbye. I'm in denial. Severe denial.

2. St. Patrick's Day! This holiday is a way, way bigger deal here than it is in the Midwest. I've never seen so much green in my life. I spent a fantastic night at the Pit, and I don't think I've ever had so much fun dancing in my life! They played regular club music along with Great Big Sea and other folk favorites, which gave us the excuse to clap, stomp, jump around, and holler at the top of our lungs. A truly fantastic night.

3. Getting sick. This is the not-fun part of my recent activities. Friday evening, I threw up all over the hallway in my friend's apartment building and spent the next several hours on the floor of my bathroom. I can now cross "spend eleven hours studying the internal acoustics of a Canadian toilet" off my bucket list. For the record, there was no alcohol involved in my malady, and I am feeling much, much better. I still have very little energy, but I'm on the slow road to recovery.

Not much else to report, other than a lot of homework. More now that I spent one of my allotted homework days lying in bed, watching movies, drinking Powerade, and nibbling crackers. Anyway, I'll hopefully do something exciting enough to take pictures at some point.

Keep reading!

Love,

Maggie

Touring CBU: my bedroom

I've been in Canada for well over two months now, and none of you have seen my room!

If you open the door to my room from the hallway, there is a small entryway. It's a square room, not even big enough to lie down, with three doors. The door to the right is Paula's room. She's my roommate. The door straight ahead is our bathroom. The door to the left is my room.

If you come in my door and turn left, this is what you see. This is my closet, laundry basket, and desk.

Here's a better shot of my desk. This is probably the only time it's ever been this clean. The flowers are fake, but they brighten up the room quite a bit. The calendar is, quite literally, the only thing on my wall, unless you count the mirror that comes standard-issue with the room.

This last image is of my bed and part of my window. It was snowing very heavily when this picture was taken, so you can't see out the window at all. However, it offers a prime view of the courtyard between the dorms and lets in a good deal of light when the sun is out. I've been teased several times for my tendency to sit in the sunbeam like a cat. It's a prime homework location!

I like my room. It's fairly simple, but I have no complaints. I do wish I could get my desk closer to the window, but alas...

I especially love having a private bathroom. My roommate and I have different schedules, so our shower times never conflict. Sharing with one other person is much easier than sharing with thirty-odd other people, like I did at Augie.

I'll miss this room when I go. I'll miss everything when I go.

Keep reading!

Love,

Maggie

Funny stuff my professors say: vol. 2

I have continued to chronicle the hilarity that comes from the mouths of my professors. Here we have volume 2. For volume 1, click here.

[Mary Keating]

"They didn't expect [Tolkien] to finish all that. I suspect that no one in their right mind expected him to finish all that."

[Ian Brodie]

"Blaming technology is the last refuge of the coward."

"In 1600 and 1650... I'm pulling these numbers out of my ass, but I can back it up."

"The student union presidential candidate gave you cookies? Don't fall for that. Vote for the no-cookie ballot. Eat the cookies, though. Screw 'em."

"This is the first time I've taught with a disc. Because, you know, I'm not a stinkin' hippie."

"You are so lucky that I'm not a bastard."

"It's cute, but it's dirty. Because it's about a rooster."

"Every time I got to Newfoundland, they make jokes [about hooked rugs]. 'I'm a proud hooker! I've been a hooker for years!' They all giggle, and you have to giggle, too."

"That's a lot of feces. That's a cesspit full of feces, which is a standardized unit of measure."

"Let's not have sex in the pooper... in both senses of the word."

[allow me to put this in context: we were discussing the cultural significance of outhouses in Newfoundland, and someone mentioned that these outhouses were once used for sex. A lot of naughty jokes ensued]

"I'm one of those anti-scurvy people, and I don't care who knows it. I'll take a stand."

"That's not the reaction you usually have when you're hit in the testicles, but it had a type of artistry to it."

"I'm going to dance with her. I have to listen to fiddle music to do it, but dammit, I'm going to do it."

"What was I talking about? I was talking about Daniel touching people's butts. And transvestitism."

"AIDS can sort of be funny now."

[Richard Marchand]

Moment of silence for this guy... he's been replaced for the rest of the semester due to medical issues.

"Stamps were sexy in those days."

"She loved sex, which meant she was usually pregnant. It really all comes down to sex, in the end."

"If the daughter fell in love with the chauffeur, my god, there was hell to pay."

"He says, 'Think too much of the body, and you'll go to the wall,' but he should've said 'hell.' Everyone knows that's what he meant, anyway."

[Anna Daniels]

"Okay, we have to stop brainstorming about pizza. It's making me hungry."

"Ad infinitum. It means, to infinity... and beyond! I'm kidding."

"That's what I should do. I should get some Donald Trump hair and give you a whole bunch of scenarios and just say 'You're fired' if you give me the wrong answer."

"Well, they can go suck a lemon."

"They don't get any more funding from the government. But it's good because they're no longer connected to stupid Harper and his sweater vests."

"They used to say girls were stupid. Ah, how the tables have turned!"

"Let the reader know you're not using a backhoe to bury a hamster."

"I got into a fight with my neighbor over a snowblower. I think our relationship is over."

Enjoy, and keep reading!

Love,

Maggie

One of those really great weekends.

So great that it needs to be chronicled.

While we were in Halifax, Stephen Morris and I discovered that we share a love for bleu cheese, an uncommon love on the Cape. From this was born the idea that we would cook something bleu-cheesy together, and from this was born The Potluck.

On Saturday night, we gathered at Maile's apartment for an evening of food, friends, fiddles, and fun. Everyone brought a dish that somehow included cheese, and we ate ourselves sick.

Some of the dishes include:

• Cheese pockets (Jaime)
• Bleu macaroni and cheese (Stephen)
• Spinach and strawberry salad (Steven)
• Casserole (Julie)
• Cheesecake (Dan)
• Bean dip (Becca)
• Cheese and crackers (Maile)

This is my dish: raspberry walnut baked brie. The recipe can be found here. It was very pretty before I put it in the oven. But when I put it in the oven...

...this happened. I guess I didn't seal my puff pastry well enough, because the brie came pouring out the sides like a much more delicious biblical deluge. Ah well. It was still absolutely delicious and disappeared pretty quickly. Actually, all of the food was really spectacular, but the best part of the night was the music.

Maile and Dan are both accomplished fiddle players and decided to serenade us with some music toward the end of the evening. I'm not going to pretend like I remember the names of the songs they played, but fiddle music is among the most wonderful in the world.

Maile has been playing the violin since the age of seven and started learning the fiddle when she was ten. She was in a performance group for several years in high school and performs regularly at a local pub with Dan.

I don't know Dan's fiddle history, so I cannot chronicle it for you. Suffice to say he is very, very talented. At some point, my hope is to get a video of the two of them playing, just so all of my lovely readers can enjoy the music.

After the cheese potluck, I spent a few hours laughing and chatting with some friends in Harriss. Names you may remember: Tim, Devon, Eric, Rob. The usual folk. It wasn't a particularly remarkable weekend in terms of exoticism, but the people-time was fantastic.

Today, I have two presentations to give and will meet with a professor later to discuss fall's classes. That's right, folks: today may be the day in which I learn whether or not I can stay for another semester.

Keep your fingers crossed, and keep reading!

Love,

Maggie

How to speak Canadian: vol. 3

It's been a while since you've been treated to a linguistics lesson, my darling readers. Also, I might possibly be doing a little teeny bit of procrastinating.

This is the 26th letter of the alphabet. In the states, we say "zee." In Canada, we say "zed," which rhymes with "head." Pretty straight-forward. You may think that opportunities to mispronounce letters would be scarce. However, I am an avid Bananagrams player, and my friends correct me every time I say, "Shoot! I don't want a zee!"

Another term I've learned is puck bunny. A puck bunny is a girl/woman who only dates hockey players. So, a very picky jersey chase.

The picture I've provided features Inga Skaya, who was the 2008 Canadian candidate for Miss Universe. She wore this costume to maintain the proper Canadian spirit, not to look like a puck bunny. However, an image search of "puck bunny" generates a whole lot pictures that are very Hugh-Hefner-esque. Think maple leaves in place of Playboy bunnies. Anyway, I figured this would be a more appropriate illustration than a half-naked women using goalie gloves in place of a bra.

Last but not least for today, we have this lovely item, usually called a couch or a sofa. Canadians say Chesterfield. However, one should note that not all Canadians use this word. From what I've gathered, the term is about as popular as "davenport": recognizable, but mostly used by citizens over the age of 50.

My collection of slang is growing quickly, so volume four may appear fairly soon. Not so soon as to enable further procrastination, but I digress. I'm going to study for my Children's Lit midterm. Wish me luck, and keep reading!

Love,

Maggie

Turning 21 in Canada

Hat-tip to Caitlin DeVos for kicking my booty and making me blog again. I've been neglecting you guys again! I won't write about my whole Halifax trip. I'll just write about my birthday. This post will have lots of pictures, because it was the best birthday ever.

A stack of buddies from CBU were in Halifax for a few days, and we spent the whole day together. Here we are at Cora's, which is an adorable breakfast place with fantastic food. The fresh fruit was phenomenal.

From left to right: Jaime, Becca, Daniel, Stephen, Maggie, Maile.

Our next stop was the Natural History Museum, to visit Sue! For my readers who are not nerdosaurs, Sue is the most complete T-rex skeleton ever found. We honored her with a silly picture. At the museum, we met up with Bini, who is a friend of Maile's from Calgary. She's the girl in the blue-and-black shirt.

The rest of the afternoon was spent wandering around Halifax and shopping. This particular store is called Black Market. It boasts handmade jewelry, clothing, housewares, and more from all over the world at excellent prices. This picture is a meager tribute to how colorful this store is. I bought a pair of earrings for myself and a gift for my mother, and I had to resist buying all the pretty linens!

We enjoyed supper at A Mano, a fabulous Italian restaurant near the water. This is my supper: pizza made with fig confit, arugula, prosciutto, and fresh mozzarella. It was the kind of food that makes you forget you ever had dignity and drool all over the table.

For dessert, I split a dish with Bini that had caramel and chocolate gelato, dulce du leche, and crushed meringues. More drooling followed.

Our final stop was the Old Triangle, an Irish alehouse in downtown Halifax. The time we spent at this pub rivals the Great Big Sea concert in terms of just how much fun we had.

This is the band High Tide, who played live music all night. They sang Nova Scotia folk classics, Great Big Sea covers, popular favorites, and original songs. They were very talented, with an infectious stage presence. They even sang happy birthday to me!

Their music was the backdrop for the dancing that consumed the rest of the night. We were easily the youngest people there, but it didn't stop anyone from having a fantastic time. I never wanted to leave! Just like the Great Big Sea concert, it was a moment of liberty, where nothing matters in the world except for the fun you are having right here, right now.

I leave you with this parting image of Bini and me dancing. Everyone should have a birthday like this in their lives.

Keep reading!

Love,

21-year-old Maggie

Great Big Sea Concert in Halifax

I've been in Halifax for 48 hours now. I want to write about the cute shops, the beautiful scenery, the kind people, the charming pubs, and the tasty food. I especially want to write about how great it is to see Julianne again. But alas... all I can write about is Great Big Sea.

Great Big Sea is a folk-rock band from Newfoundland and one of the best-known bands from eastern Canada. They played a free concert in honor of the 2011 Canada Games tonight at Celebration Square, and Julianne was kind enough to bring us along.

Excluding the drummer, each of the members played at least a half-dozen instruments, which they switched every song. We saw flutes, drums, accordions, fiddles, and several different manners of guitar, not to mention some fantastic singing voices.

I haven't been to very many concerts, so I'm not a good judge of what makes a "good concert." But I have never had so much fun in my life.

The band was infectious, and the crowd was on fire. We were so enthusiastic and bouncy and happy. It was one of those moments where you feel truly independent and free, where you're living your life and nothing can stop you. I didn't stop smiling the entire time. We left over an hour ago, and I'm still riding the high.

And now I'm a GBS fangirl. Hardcore. Just another step to becoming Almost Canadian.

Some GBS songs: Donkey Riding - Ordinary Day - When I'm Up

More Halifax updates tomorrow. Keep reading!

Love,

Maggie

I'm in Halifax!

Hey gang! Sorry I haven't been posting recently, but I've been planning our trip to Halifax!

Currently, I'm sitting in the hotel room with Becca, relaxing after our looong car ride with Alysha. We're laying low tonight, but the fun begins tomorrow!

Here's just a sample of the things we're seeing:

• Museum of Natural History
• Pier 21 Immigration Museum
• Spring Garden Road
• Alexander Keith Brewery
• Maritime Museum of the Atlantic

We're also thinking about going to Peggy's Cove. And I guarantee we'll do a LOT of shopping.

This weekend, we'll spend some time with Julianne, who you may remember from my trip over. We'll hopefully see Tracey, too. On Tuesday, we'll be joined by Maile, Jaime, Stephen, and Daniel for a few days, and they're going to help me celebrate my birthday!

That's right, gang. I'm turning 21 on Wednesday, the 23rd. Like all birthdays, it feels a little surreal. This one will be especially interesting because I'm not in the states. Back home, the 21st birthday is a heavily ritualized drunkfest that celebrates your newfound freedom in the liquor store. Here, I'm already legal to drink, and I can't say I'm sad to miss out on that particular landmark. I'm more than happy to enjoy a fun dinner with friends and maybe a night dancing without imbibing enough alcohol to flood a bathtub.

I'll do my best to write every night and upload photos from our adventures. One thing's for sure: this will be a birthday to remember.

Keep reading!

Love,

Maggie

A trip to downtown Sydney

I went to downtown Sydney today! I'd never been before, it and it was a fabulous day. Even now, as I write, I'm trying to decide what I should write about.

First thing's first. There is a giant fiddle in downtown Sydney, right on the harbor. It's about 17 meters tall, made of steel, and weighs eight tons. The fiddle was built to honor the opening of the Joan Harriss Cruise Pavilion, which is the building directly behind it. The giant fiddle is a must-see for anyone who visits the island. In the summer, it even plays music!

My companions for the day were Becca, Maile, and Jaime. Maile is from Calgary, and studies history and ethnomusicology at CBU. She's a closet communist and a wicked fiddle player. Jaime is from Switzerland and studies history and Celtic stuff. And if anyone who reads this blog doesn't know who Becca is... shame on you.

After a visit to the fiddle, we wandered around to a few shops, including the Cape Breton Curiosity Shop, the Cape Breton Fudge Co., and the Cape Breton Center for Craft and Design. All of these stores were fabulous and will probably take more than a little of my money by the time I leave. However, our most exciting visit was Gala.

The Gala is a wonderful vintage/consignment shop in downtown Sydney. The owner is Rick Jessome, a deeply fabulous local man who knows more about clothes than anyone I've ever met before. With his guidance, Jaime found some great skirts and shirts, Becca found an awesome coat for less than $20, and Maile bought a beautiful party top. But I struck gold.

This is a 100% cashmere Gloria Sachs suit. It probably cost around $2500 in the eighties, when it was made. However, I managed to talk Rick down from $99 to $70. A mere seventy dollars for a classic suit, whose fabulousness is not properly showcased in this photo. I also found an adorable pencil skirt and a cute top, but this suit stole the show.

To round out the day, we visited a used bookstore and a coffee shop. It was an absolutely fantastic day of exploring Sydney. Tonight, I'm headed over to Maile and Jaime's apartment and we're going to try making butterbeer. Yes, as in Harry Potter butterbeer. Wish us luck.

Keep reading!

Love,

Maggie

More travel blogs!

Many of my friends are spending this semester abroad! While I'm sure you are deeply enthralled with the goings-on of a wannabe Canadian, I must encourage you to broaden your horizons and follow the day-to-day lives of some other globe trotters.

Becca Adelman

Becca is an International Studies major with a film studies minor, pursuing a degree at Western Oregon University. She grew up in Salem, Oregon, with her parents and little brother.

Here at CBU, Becca is taking two French classes, a history class, a folklore class, and a literature class. She is a voracious reader, a fantastic workout buddy, and my best friend on campus.

Her blog can be found here.

Megan Erspamer

Megan studies business and accounting at Augustana College, with hopes to go into sports management. She is from Chetek, Wisconsin, and we were roommates during our sophomore year at Augie.

Megan runs track and cross country for Augie, and is the world's biggest 24 fan. I suspect that she secretly aspires to be Jack Bauer.

Currently, Megan is spending a semester at Bond University in Australia. Last semester, she was in Norway. The woman is unstoppable.

Her blog can be found here.

Kaleb Sturm

This enthusiastic gentleman is spending the semester at Massey University in New Zealand. Kaleb is majoring in math and economics at Augustana College, and he's adding a little geology to the mix while he's at Massey. Kaleb was born and raised in St. James, Minnesota.

Kaleb plays tennis for Augie, does econometric research for fun, loves bunnies, and is absolutely head-over-heels for his one-and-a-half-year-old nephew, Brayden. He's also my best friend on the planet.

His blog can be found here.

Paul Hummon

Paul is studying mechanical engineering at the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign. He's spending a semester down under at the University of Melbourne. He's from Plymouth, Minnesota.

Paul and I have known each other for a very, very long time, though we're not sure exactly when we met. We went to the same elementary, middle, and high schools, and went to prom together in 2007. Paul is a champion percussionist and was a prize-winning member of Wayzata's Super Mileage Club.

His blog can be found here.

Rose Martin

Rose is studying Spanish and social work at Bethel University. She is from Plymouth, Minnesota, and is currently in Guatemala.

Rose is wonderful with children, loves coloring, and is an active member of her church. We met through mutual friends when we were just starting high school, and we were married on Facebook until we realized that we were probably long-lost twins rather than spouses.

Rose's blog can be found here.

Well, there you have it, folks. A handful of America'a finest, scattered across the globe in search of life-changing experiences and spiritual enlightenment. I'll be back with more Canadian adventures soon. In the meantime, enjoy!

Love,

Maggie

Real Canadians: Kevin Regnault

It has come to my attention that I haven't thoroughly introduced you, my lovely readers, to my friends here in the Great White North. As a result, I'm kicking off a new series of posts over the next few weeks: Real Canadians.

Kevin "Jesus" Regnault, oldest of three boys, self-proclaimed hippie, avid tea-drinker and charity worker, chemical engineering major

Age: 21

Hometown: Calgary, Alberta, Canada

Dream Job: Professional musician

Realistic Dream Job: Something with green energy

Favorite Book: Discworld Series by Terry Pratchett

Favorite Movie: Up

Interests: Reading, video games, hiking, kayaking, canoeing, and music. Kevin sings and he plays the guitar, the bass, and the piano. He also can tune a harp, which I think is pretty cool.

Deep, dark secret: Kevin has apparently been arrested three times, though he has never been charged. No, I don't know why.

How we met: My first night on campus, I was waiting for the bus stop in a panic, and Kevin found me there. The next day, he took me under his wing and showed me around campus. We've been friends ever since.

Memorable Quotes

"I love how the analytical chemists are sledding down the hill behind Alumni."

"That's my angry Canadian redneck voice."

"I love the profs here. They know you and they make fun of you and they trip you in the hall."

"Most people think I'm gay when they first meet me. I have a rainbow tie and rainbow slippers."

Stay tuned for more Real Canadians!

[Kevin's reaction to this profile:]

"Maggie, you make it sound like, 'he plays every instrument known to man, loves puppies, art, the environment and long walks on the beach, is super mysterious and can bench 7 million pounds. oh, and he makes lots of money.' Not that I'm upset..."

Love,

Maggie

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Tight 'n Bright - it's not what it sounds like.

Last night was a theme night at the campus bar, called the Pit. In honor of Pride Week, we celebrated Tight 'n Bright, where everyone shoehorned themselves into the snuggest and shiniest get-ups they could throw together.

Becca and I spent the afternoon at the Mayflower Mall with Lauren and Candace. As is seen in this deeply stylish photograph, Becca went for plaid, whereas I chose the neon Peter Pan look. I doubt we'll ever wear those tights again, but I got enough compliments on my purple boots that they will definitely become a staple of my wardrobe.

Becca and I also bought alcohol for the first time yesterday. We both felt a little weird, but we're still very careful with our alcohol consumption. No inebriation from these American diplomats!

Here we have the deeply fabulous Tim. Tim grabbed the night by the hot pink horns and wore accessories to match. He deserved and won Tightest 'n Brightest Male for the evening, and has been showing off his gift card prize ever since. Well done, my friend.

When we got to the Pit, we saw tutus, leotards, and thigh-highs. One girl was wearing a homemade, technicolor, duct tape corset. A few guys wore tights like Tim's and skipped the shorts. I fear that no amount of psychotherapy will help the student body's collective conscience to recover from that image, but alas... this is Tight 'n Bright. There are no boundaries.

Altogether, another fantastic evening spent at the Pit. A touch of vertigo was the only wrench in the plans, and even that was manageable, what with my caring and considerate Canadian companions. And Becca, of course, who is a gift from the Oregon gods.

Homework today. Like that's new.

Keep reading!

Love,

Maggie

Funny stuff my professors say: vol. 1

I've gotten into the habit of writing down the funny things my professors say. Here is the first month of hilarity, slightly censored.

[Ian Brodie]

"What's Gaelic for Rick Roll'd?"

"Powerpoint doesn't allow for spontaneous brilliance!"

"Yay! Makin' babies!"

"'Freaky-ass space' is a technical term. You might want to write that down."

"I went to see my hot dentist yesterday. I've never had a hot dentist before."

[student] "Where is she?"

"My dreams..."

"We reenact this really awkward tea party that happened in Gethsemane where Jesus was like, 'Hey man, eat this! By the way, it's my flesh!'"

"Sorry I have to read this to you, but my tones are reasonably dulcet."

[Richard Marchand]

"I've been twisting some arms to get a children's lit section in the library. It's why I've been lifting weights recently."

"When I was a kid, people would say the gypsies would get you. I didn't even know what gypsies were, but they terrified me. That and hobos. If the gypsies didn't get you, the hobos would."

--

"In those days, the great villain was the hobo."

"Bush was... oh, there's Americans in here... can I insult him?"

"One of these days, I'll come in to class and have an outrageous interpretation and someone had better challenge me."

"Reading her is like having a milkshake with a spoonful of vinegar in it... it's like, for God's sake, Christina, have you ever heard of the word fun?!"

"I always want to skip to songs like this."

"I always was afraid the devil would come into my room. Because you don't want to talk to the devil. You just don't."

--

"Ever since that whole devil thing, I've given up sleeping. It's too dangerous."

"You can stand on the desk or something equally flamboyant, wear sequined tights, and proclaim the gospel."

"This is my list of instructions to me."

[Anna Daniels]

"it was the most frightening thing I've ever seen pie come out of in my life. It was very wonderful but also very scary. I didn't eat the pie."

"So far, we've covered Steven Harper, marijuana, and otters. What did you learn in school today?"

Weekend Update - Canadian Vertigo Strikes!

You may have noticed that I haven't posted for a few days. As a result, this post will be a fingersnap-quick recap of my days since the Great Snow Day of 2011.

Thursday

Snow day! Game day! Amazing day! In the cafeteria, we played Bananagrams, Clue, Scrabble, and Phase10. Later, Becca and I wandered over to Maile's apartment, where we played Settlers of Catan and gossiped for hours. Quite possibly the best snow day ever.

Friday

This day was dedicated to homework. How boring. However, I did make it over to the Pit again, where Maile bought me my first shot. It had a naughty name and made me cough like a pack-a-day smoker, but it was a threshold to be crossed.

Saturday

This was a day of more homework. If I remember correctly, I spent eight hours reading and writing, and celebrated my hard work by playing Truth or Dare with a bunch of Canadians. Later on, we went sledding!

Sledding was fabulously fun until the trauma of the night: one thwack on the head, and vertigo struck.

Vertigo is so debilitating that I remember very little of what happened after I hit my head. I remember being hauled into the building by a pair of strapping Canadian gentlemen, and I was moved from bed to bed for the rest of the evening so I could be part of the group activities. Beyond that, I remember no details. Except one.

Everyone was so unbelievably kind. People carried me around, brought me water, asked after my well-being, and generally babied me for the rest of the night. I've known most of these people for only a few weeks, and yet they treat me like a life-long friend. I would've done the same for them without a moment's hesitation, but it was still one of those nights that restores your faith in humanity.

For reference, I made a full recovery!

Sunday

Homework. Boring. However, I did get to have a Girl Night with Becca for the first time in a while, filled with trashy television and girly gossip!

Vertigo aside, a fantastic weekend. And I promise I won't neglect my posting again! Keep reading!

Love,

Maggie

"Snoowwww Day"

I woke up to that text this morning, from my Newfoundland friend Devon. I was planning to sleep in, and I wasn't exactly pleased that he had woken me up... until I read his message and looked outside. Then he was a hero.

This is the view outside my window. Notice that you can't actually see anything on account of the ice caked on my window.

The best part is that there's probably not even six inches of snow on the ground. I know I'm cocky about the fact that Minnesota schools don't cancel if there's six feet of snow on the ground, but I could get used to this!

I'll report back on my first Canadian snow day tomorrow! Keep reading!

Love,

Maggie

My first solo outing.

Let's think back to my first trip on the Cape Breton Transit System bus.

It was about 7:00 at night, I had been on campus for less than two hours, and I was absolutely terrified. I had myself so worked up that I was actually pacing at the bus stop until Kevin and Jamie showed up and made me feel less alone. My shopping trip was an ordeal. I could barely suppress my panic as I wandered the aisles, and came apart at the seams as soon as I was back in the safety of my room. I got what I needed on the trip, but it was far from a success.

Now, fast forward exactly 22 days. I went to the mall today. My beloved purple cell phone broke in my hands a few days ago, and is being held together by hockey tape (how Canadian!). I decided to buy a prepaid so I could text my Canadian friends and not worry about ripping my precariously bandaged phone.

I did my research, picked my company, and figured out where to buy my new phone. I needed to get to Future Shop in the mall, which requires a trip on the bus. I planned my day carefully: I would catch the bus right after class, zip through the mall, get my phone, and be ready to go in time for the next bus back to campus. I was a little nervous...

BUT I DID IT.

I did it. I went by myself to the Mayflower Mall (okay, Kyle was on my bus), chatted up some Future Shop employees, secured my phone with miraculous swiftness, and even had time to nab a super-late Christmas present for Becca (yoga mats were on sale!) before I hopped back on the bus.

The woman sitting next to me on the bus spent the ten-minute ride telling me all about her cats, but I was busy thinking. In three short weeks, I had gone from being a panicky, clueless foreigner to a capable, confident resident of the Great White North. I put my WalMart-fearing days behind me and conquered the mall like a true denizen.

I did it. I achieved my first solo outing. And that, my friends, is a big deal.

Keep reading!

Love,

Maggie

How to speak Canadian: vol. 2

When I wrote my first volume of "How to speak Canadian," I figured it would be a while before I compiled enough terminology for a second installment. I was wrong.

We Americans are ignorant. We're so hung up on our own weird vernaculars of "y'all" and "duck, duck, gray duck" that we don't realize how unique the language is with our neighbors to the north. There's a different set of linguistic rules out here in the Maritimes that we know nothing about. And that's unacceptable. So buckle down, kids. It's time to learn.

First of all, we have a cultural food item. It's called poutine. To make it, start with a layer of french fries, then add melted cheese and gravy. It's very popular and totally grosses me out. Open-minded travelers should try new things, but I can't make myself eat this. Sorry, Canada.

Next on the list is a simple slang term. As you know, macaroni and cheese is a staple of collegiate diets everywhere, and Cape Breton is no exception. However, the denizens of the island do not say the familiar "mac-n-cheese" of the states. They say KD. Obviously, this is an acronym for Kraft Dinner, but some Americans are dweebs who need this spelled out for them. Not me, though... ahem.

Last but not least, I've picked up bits and pieces of vocabulary in class. First of all, there are no grades here. There are marks, and they are given in percentage form. This blew my sad little ABCDF mind. It also amused my tech writing classmates, who are apparently the most common witnesses to my vernacular blunders.

Another thing I've noticed is how people reference other class periods. Instead of saying "last class," or "next time we meet," my professors all say "last day," or "next day." When assigning homework, they will say, "Please read chapter four for next day," or when referring to a previous class, they will say, "Remember the exercise we did last day?" This seems minor, but it's very noticeable and a bit startling until you get used to it.

For my Canadian readers: if you feel like I'm leaving anything out, please post suggestions in the comments!

Everyone else, I hope you feel properly educated. Keep reading, and see you next day!

Love,

Maggie

Field research: campus bar

(yes, this is a day late - my apologies)

Research objective - observe and participate in pre-bar and bar activities with seasoned college students and bar-goers.

Wingwoman - Becca. We created a few social objectives before the night began: we wouldn't get drunk, we wouldn't buy our own drinks, and we would leave immediately if we felt uncomfortable or if anyone started vomiting.

Official escort - Kyle. He was nice enough to walk with us over to the Pit and make sure we knew what was going on before he went off in pursuit of whatever boys like Kyle pursue at bars.

Other participants, listed imcompletely, and in no particular order - Zeb, Tim, Eric, Andrew, Lacey, Alora, Rob (2), Candace, Devon, A.J.

Location - Cape Breton University

a. Harriss Hall dorm room - where we met our companions for the evening and participated in an activity called pre-gaming, which is the consumption of alcohol in preparation for consuming more alcohol at the bar. For the record, Becca and I are terrible pre-gamers in the eyes of more experienced drinkers. Apparently splitting one shot (provided by the [in]famous Tim) between the two of us didn't count.

b. The Pit - the on-campus bar where the night's festivities were focused. The theme was Sunglasses at Night, with a $2 cover charge that was lifted by the time we arrived.

Outcome - In a word: awesome. In one night, Becca and I participated in every Bar Cliché known to humankind:

1. I rescued Becca from an overly enthusiastic and overly intoxicated guy who really, really wanted to thumb-wrestle with her. This happened several times.

2. Someone bought us drinks (A.J., thanks again!).

3. I teamed up with a nice guy from Newfoundland to play two-on-two pool against Becca and Kyle. We also got good at the whole hold-my-beer-while-I-take-this-shot move.

4. I danced with good-looking gentlemen.

5. We had a fantastic time.

Wanna know the best part? I wasn't even drunk. Not even close. And I still enjoyed myself! I might've been buzzed, but that was probably just the natural euphoria that comes with trying new things and succeeding. I know next to nothing about the drinking culture on other campuses, but at CBU, intoxication is optional.

Conclusion - I don't need to be drunk to have fun.

Keep reading!

Love,

Maggie